Getting Older, Not Growing Up

I hope everyone enjoyed thanksgiving with friends and family!  I ate like I was about to go into hibernation and I wouldn't have minded if that had been the case, especially with finals just around the corner.  But on the bright side, it is officially Christmas time so bring on the good tidings!

Being home has reminded me of how much I am growing up.  Probably because when I come home my mom takes such good care of me and I totally let her.  But I am now officially over two weeks into being 20 years old. Wait what?!? Yeah, two decades!  That seems so old to me, NOT saying that anything older is old, just I can't believe I have lived and lived through 20 years of life.  I can't help but feel a twinge of something, and I don't know exactly what, when I think about it.  Life is coming full steam ahead and it's time to start getting excited about the future and what God has in store for me. Yet, the other day as I was filling out a form I still found myself accidentally writing 19 in the "age" blank.

Maybe it's because I don't feel mature enough to be 20. You could probably ask any of my friends and family and they'd tell you just how silly I can be. I, personally, like to say I'm still a kid at heart.

 After talking to friends already in the real world, or on their way, and getting closer myself,  I've come to the conclusion to be in the mind set of: getting older but not growing up. 

I'm accepting the years are going to keep on coming-- I'm no longer in denial, but that doesn't mean I'm ready to retire my crazy adventurous side. I have been going through 1 and 2 Corinthians lately and as I started thinking about my predicament of 'never getting younger again,' I was reminded of a passage I had read. 

Brothers, stop thinking like children. In regard to evil be infants, but in your thinking be adults. 

1 Corinthians 14:20

Getting older, at times, requires that we think like adults. Responsibilities and reality never go away. But I believe that the Lord never planned on us going through our life getting more serious with age either. just wiser. He wants us to be innocent of what is evil and with innocence comes a joy that only the Lord can provide. There is a difference between innocence and ignorance though, and it is important that we know this as well.

So whether you're still "preparing" for your future or living your future right now, remember to enjoy it.  Make everyday an adventure. Smile and laugh and be spontaneous and crazy every once in a while.   Don't let the trials and tribulations of the world that we go through as we get older jade your heart or chaff at your spirit. Show off that eternal joy that not even the pains of life can take away!

God's Blessings,

Karsyn Penelope

A Really Sad Story

Okay, first of all let me preface this story with the fact that it is really not that sad in the grande scheme of life, but in the moment it was truly devastating. 

September 14, 2013

It was the day of the A&M v. Bama game. The "biggest game of all of college football this season," according to ESPN. The hype in College Station was absolutely insane. We already have a traffic problem here but this week took it to a whole new level. 

So my roommates and I planned to leave several hours early to give ourselves time to get on campus, walk around to some tailgates, and just soak in the game day atmosphere. We tucked our IDs and tickets into our boots and started the very long trek from our car to campus. As we were coming up to Kyle Field, I looked down to check my boot for my ticket. My heart immediately dropped.. It wasn't there... I was overwhelmed with a sinking feeling of disappointment, anger at myself, self-pity, and the surprising urge to laugh/cry hysterically. Why me, out of all games...

Well really long story short, we did everything we could to find it, and believe me I mean everything. But I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I couldn't go to THE game of the year. I'm not going to lie, it was a very depressing time. 

So anyways I called up one of my friends who was unfortunately, but fortunately for me, unable to go to the game we as well. I asked her to come get me from campus so I could watch the game with her at her house. Once in the car I told her my pathetic story. I have to say I was proud of myself for holding back tears, but once I called my mom, I'll admit, a few did escape. 

But throughout this whole event so many truths were popping into my mind. 

1. God totally could have provided me with another opportunity to get into the game. (He didn't, but He sure could have)

2. Finding joy in all situations-- because our joy comes from The Lord and not from some overrated, over-priced football game. (I realize what I just said was blasphemous by an Aggie in the Deep South, but this is for the purpose of the lesson. Fact is, eternally, football doesn't last.)

3. Be thankful always, for everything. I was so glad that my friend didn't have to spend her Saturday watching the game alone because everyone else had plans to go. I knew in that instance how sad she must have been when she realized she wouldn't be able to attend. But also, selfishly, I was glad that I didn't have to spend my Saturday alone. God totally provided us with each other so we wouldn't be lonely!

The upside was we got a much better view of the game in the A/C. Why he allowed this to happen to me, besides reiterating these truths, I may never know.  I won't dwell on it anymore, but it does make a pretty sad yet comical story now that some time has passed.

And the outcome of the game.. Well, we won't talk about that. 

God's Blessings, 

Karsyn Penelope

Compromise

Currently I've really been struggling with healthy habits. I don't want to be gluttonous and be so dependent on food because believe me I like to eat. I mean who doesn't?  I have a major sweet tooth but I also have a problem with accepting my body the away it is. It is a constant battle of obsessing over eating healthy and indulging in my chocolate cravings. I don't want to feel guilty for eating what I want but I don't want to look at myself and realize that I don't like what I see. It is such a hard balance and for girls everywhere it is a battle.   You have to compromise. 
One of my mentors said to me that eating is a form of worship. You are enjoying what God has blessed us with and eating is also a way of survival. 
But on the other hand, I believe that our bodies are a temple and we are to treat it with care and discipline. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Recently one of my guy friends also called me out for "conforming to society" with what we think we, as girls, are supposed to look like. And I was a little standoffish because, uh no you didn't just call me out, and then I thought we'll at least there are guys out there that don't let this world obscure the beauty of a girl just the way our Creator made us. 

Wow that was a lot of rambling but I hope any of the girls reading this know that you are not the only one struggling with this. 

God's Blessings,

      Karsyn Penelope